I'm a terrible blogger...

Its not that I forgot I had a blog...the internet has become a very rare gift to me that I get every couple of days, and if I have the time, I use it to talk to loved ones or do work. Sadly, I haven't been recording my time here. But I guess that also means I've been having a fantastic time.

I've learned the following things in the past few months:

1. There is no limit to the gluttony and selfishness of people.
2. There are still polite and reasonable people in the world.
3. I have a hard time being myself in front of crowds.
4. I am my own worst enemy.
5. Even with all the time in the world to go to the gym, I still have trouble losing weight.
6. I love food.
7. I can be in a caring, loving relationship without the idea of marriage hanging over our heads.
8. I do want kids.
9. I don't want kids.
10. I don't want kids until I'm old enough to have wisdom, but young enough to run.
11. I prefer warm weather, but not humidity.
12. I cling onto people when I know they want to leave.
13. I am explosive and a little bi-polar.
14. I like drinking, but I need more nights off than on to function.
15. I have a hard time with self motivation.
16. My "hard-working OCD" side and my "Party free-loving" side are in constant battle.
17. I would rather have a brother-like friend than a bunch of girlfriends.
18. I miss my brother.
19. I don't know whether I want to be a musical theatre performer or a singer-songwriter.
20. I don't know if I can have both and still be focused.

More stories to come. I promise this time.

I'm on a boat YEAH!

Well, not a boat. A ship. It's super large.

So I'm here! I can't believe its actually happening. So far, it's looking like this is going to be a great job. I have a little cabin that reminds me of a dorm room, but its all for myself with no windows, so I can sleep in the afternoons if I need to in complete darkness. The only downside is that its not amongst the other entertainers, so I kind of have to go out of my way to meet them and hang, which hasn't been a problem just yet. However, I pretty much have to drink to hang out, which is not great for what I planned to to. I'll have to work with that.

It's been just jumping in really quickly into what I'll be doing for six months. Right when I got on the boat, I had rehearsal, and then performed the next day. I also hosted the Karaoke, which was really hard considering I'm having to come up with banter. However, I think I'll get used to all of the above as time goes on.

This job is going to be SUUUUUPER chill. I will have a lot of time off during the day to explore the islands, practice guitar, write songs, work out, and they have free Rosetta Stone, so I've decided I'm going to learn Spanish. Something tells me I'll need it in the future...

I like everyone so far. Everyone is either super super peppy or darkly sarcastic, so either way I'm pretty happy. Also, I'm one of the only USA kids on the boat. There are barely any of us working on here. A lot of people are from Eastern Europe, Russia, Canada, Britain, South America, the Philippians, etc. I love that. Its like this floating UN.

More pictures and stories to come.  

I'm Off!

Its actually happening...after 2 months of waiting, I'm actually boarding a ship and doing this...at 6am tomorrow morning. Its about 11:30pm right now...I need to ZZZZ but I'm way too excited, and nervous, and just wondering what it will be like. This will be something completely different than I could ever expect. I think I will be fine, mayhaps more than fine. I just have to open myself up to everything, and keep my sense of self about me. I want to use this time to really feel what its like to be all together me while still being a really good worker.

Well...goodbye mainland. We'll see what's out at sea...

I got my bags all packed, my shoes tied tight, I hope I don't get in a fight...

Leaving good ol' NYC was a little rough. I decided to take a bus to Washington to visit my Grandpa and his wife instead of asking my parents to drive all the way up here to get my stuff and me and bring me home. Mistake #1. But I did save my parents a whole day trip. However, I had to lug my large suitcase, my guitar, my computer, and two other bags full of extra crap on me on the subway at 9:30 in the morning on the subway to get to the bus stop. I was that one large sardine in the whole car. I saw one person feel sorry for me, but the rest were just pissed that I existed. I understood. I said "I'm sorry" every chance I could, as I was tossed about the car, and people tried to squeeze themselves out of the car. Once I finally got to Penn station, I couldn't keep my stuff together. Not only was it heavy and cumbersome--it was falling apart. My crappy bags would not stay closed. BAHH! I need to buy new luggage. But I was already on the road to the bus, so I kept going, stopping along the way to collect my things. One nice gentleman saw my strife, and helped me carry my bag the 2 blocks to the bus stop. Really nice guy. I didn't get his name. But all was for not. I missed the bus because I couldn't get my shit together. :( However, I just waited for the next one, and got dirty looks from the Megabus people as I loaded my 4 large bags instead of my "one reasonably sized bag of luggage." But I was on the bus. A sigh of relief.

Stayed my Grandpa and Delberta and they treated me like I was staying in a 4 star hotel, which was nice after my morning of UhhhG. It was good to see him because he's in and out of being sick and in the hospital. Got picked up by Danny Capp and Julia Kennedy, and made my way to JMU. My visit was filled with hugs, which made me feel better too. I miss people. But JMU is funny. I have wonderful memories there, but I don't long for the place. I just can't wait till people graduate and move to NYC. ;)

And now I'm home, and I've been home for a week and a half, and its been wonderful. Sleeping in, yoga and running everyday to detox myself (my back is already feeling better) and spending time with me ma n' pa and brother and sister-in-law. Spent Halloween with them in Lynchburg, passing out candy and watching Rocky Horror picture show, and carving pumpkins. However, I'm very jealous of those still in NYC. Next year, I'mm be in the parade!

And now I'm just waiting...waiting waiting. Was supposed to board the ship this weekend, but now its postponed till TBA, hopefully next week. At least I get a little more time to spend with my family and study lyrics.

Uhhg. I have to start paying back my student loans. $80 a month for the rest of my life. :( This is just...poopy.

Backyard Weddings and Waiting to Exhale

My brother got married. I have a sister-in-law. Where did time go? What a beautiful wedding. We couldn't have asked for a more beautiful day. And it was a great way to say goodbye to everyone as well before I leave for 6 months. Tiffany is...just stunning. I can't even explain. When I saw her in her wedding dress, I just filled with so much joy and love. What a beautiful person. I hope that she and my brother just go on crazy adventures together and keep each other in check and help each other through their days. I can't wait till they have kids...they will be freakin gorgeous haha.

Everything medical checked out, so I'm just waiting to hear back from Landau Entertainment and Carnival about the dates and the boat I'll be placed on. However, I sent everything last Friday, and now its Thursday again...and I just want to know where I'm going and how I'm doing it. But in the meantime, I'm memorizing the corniest material ever...let just say I have to memorize the lyrics and music to "Celebrate." I'm struggling though. Every time I go to the music I'm supposed to listen to and memorize, I get distracted by Mumford and Sons, or Sufjan Stevens, or Debussy...

6 months...on a boat...this will be interesting...

You have a mid-western look about you...

When I get off work, I'm allowed to have one free beer. Obviously, I take advantage of this perk after every shift, drinking all the different English/Irish beers we have on tap. Well, every time that I sit at the bar after work, I get "hit on" or men talk to me and we end up in long conversations until I finish my beer, and they ask if they could buy me another, I say there is a one drink minimum, because there is, as an excuse to leave, and I go. Well, yesterday, this happened around 3:30 when I got off my breakfast shift and I sat and had a Newcastle (me favorite) and I tried to see if Patty the bartender would turn one of the TVs to the Tech game. A good looking 40-50 year old man told me that game just wasn't important enough. We got to talking about football, ragging on Tech for being beaten by JMU, so on and so on. He said he was from Ohio, said he moved to NYC on business, and said nothing more about his job. I assumed he was secret service, since we get a lot of those in the pub, because he had a cop look to him, and he was wearing a blue shirt with a kind of militant emblem. So we went on to talk about everything from football to my whole life story, to Al's wedding, to how much I wanted to kill his ex-girlfriends, he said "you have a mid-western look about you" yada yada, until I finished my beer. He offered to buy me another and I told him no, just like the other times with the other men. He kind of got quiet after that. And then I left and told him thank you for suggesting Little Italy and China town to eat, and that I would visit the world trade centers and take the ferry around to see NYC from the water. 

So tonight, we had Sunday Night Football on in the bar and people were commentating on NBC, and there he is. This guy I met in the bar. This guy I had a bunch of good laughs with and talked football and told my life story. I was shocked. I did a double take. Who is this guy?

Dan Patrick. Of the Dan Patrick show. Of NBC Football of ESPN of Sports Illustrated of movies, television, radio. What?! I had NO IDEA WHO HE WAS! Maybe that's why he talked to me for a while, but no wonder he said I seemed like a mid-westerner...who didn't own a television. And I told him that I liked football. Well, obviously not enough. 

If you're like me and didn't know, heres a link to his website: http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/danpatrick/

Hopefully he'll come back into the bar...and maybe I wont turn down his drink this time. ;)

I work with sexy, tall Leprechauns

I'm on my third week of work at the Old Castle Pub. I live there practically. I eat there. I keep my stuff there. I could shower there if I wanted to. It's one of those nicer hole in the wall pubs in the city that is kinda tucked away on a semi-busy 54th and 7th. When I walk off the subway to get to my job, I see the theatre for "Promises Promises" and the Ed Sullivan Theatre where they film "The Late Show." Bad Boy Entertainment is down the way. And I can see the lights of Times Square. You turn the corner, and there is my restaurant, lookin like a toy castle attached to a giant hotel. The "Ziegfeld" is across the street. My coworker Roison said that one of us should dress up like a castle and advertise on the street. I hate that. Its worse than the Commons, JMU kids. So many people trying to sell shit. So many human signs and people dressed as giant animals. Its a circus.

Anyway, I work with a bunch of Irish kids who live in NYC just for fun, with some California girls in the mix. Some are students, and some are just trying to figure their lives out and wanted to do it in NY. The bartenders are...well lets just say they are very attractive, not to mention their accents. That's just the first perk. They feed me two meals a day, which happen to be very good Irish and Mexican dishes, and I get a free beer at the end of my shift. And not piss beer. I could have a Guinness if I wanted. Only down side is some shifts can be 12 hours long, and man. Its exhausting. My days off are jewels. 

So much better than the last job. Aeropostale in the Manhattan Mall. Never again. What a clusterfuck of crazy people throwing shirts everywhere. It was a never ending folding mission. And the managers couldn't remember my name after having worked there for 3 weeks. There was one night where I was there till 2am folding, and even then I had to ask to leave. I kind of never quit...but I just started not showing up. I still need my paycheck from that job...

O and auditioning! haha. Remember that thing I came up here to do? Well I've been to at least 10 since I've been here. The very first one the guy told me I needed to lose 30lbs, which is true. I've known that all along, and I am taking small strides that will become big strides to conquer my chub. Most auditions I've felt good and got positive feedback, but didn't get a callback. Except for the Avenue Q audition. I made it through typing out, but by the time I auditioned, I wasn't warmed up and had been up since 5am, and practically screamed the last note. :/

However, in the past few weeks, auditioning has tapered off for me, in that I haven't been going to as many. I'll go to one a week, but I have a contract now with Carnival Cruise lines to be a front singer in a band on the boat. I'm just waiting on everything medical to go through, hence the still working at the Pub. You just never know. If that happens, I'll leave here near the end of October and cheat a NYC winter, returning in April. muahahaha. 

There are so many dogs screaming outside my window right now...Michael Vick must be in town.